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I totally agree … what a mouthful of Ps!

But these words actually have an important meaning. Effectively, they suggest that we are totally in control of what we perceive from the world around us – people and circumstances.

We all have, at some stage of our lives, been in situations where we have thought or said, “Gosh, look at that person over there, aren’t they being rude, I would never act like that.” Or perhaps, “Look how this person is carrying on, talk about being childish, I am glad I am not like that.”

When we acknowledge certain characteristics in other people or situations, we are – wait for it – actually acknowledging that part of ourselves.

This is the mirror effect; everything around us is a reflection of what is going on in our internal world. In other words our outer world is a reflection of our internal world…. What we see in others is really what we see in ourselves!

It is up to us how we perceive everything around us. What we focus on is what we will see, what we project is what is going on in us. So… the next time you find yourself around a person that annoys you or if you find yourself in a situation where you are going to make a judgment about something, ask yourself this: How is this a reflection of myself?

Try to connect with the part of you in which a response has been triggered, as a result of this situation (it may be a feeling or a thought)… here is where you’ll discover hidden beliefs you have about yourself.

This is also the case when you have positive reactions, such as when you are around people or situations that motivate you or lift up your spirit – you are recognising those qualities in yourself.

In other words the traits that you respond to in others and the traits that you recognise in yourself, both positive and negative.

So… whatever is going on for you, in your life or at work at this very moment, whatever emotion or vibration you resonate, is what you will experience in your reality.

For some people this sounds like a ‘far out’ concept, but our brain is an amazing organ and more often than not we don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are. Think of it this way …. imagine that you are the leader of a diverse team and one member is creating resistance in some way. You see them as a pain in the neck, so therefore you react … unconsciously you behave in a resisting kind of way too and then guess what? Yes, it becomes an unproductive relationship.

When you are able to pause, and acknowledge the things that make you react, looking at them with new understanding that they are a reflection of yourself, it becomes easier to see that if you are not getting the results you want from any particular situation in your life or career, you can actually learn from it, and effect change.

You are just like a magnet. You will attract the experience you want to learn from and the emotions you want to experience – your indicator is what is going on outside of you and it will be the sign of what you have to change inside of you.

You are the creator of your reality, everything that you experience, every person you meet and every moment of every day good or bad is your creation. You will learn a great deal if you pay attention to your responses to life, work and all your relationships …Mastering your emotions will be the greatest tool you have in assisting you to create new habits and neural pathways and, in doing so, enable you to achieve better outcomes.

Next time you have any form of resistance, ask yourself what you need to learn from the experience or how you can see it in a different light and how you might be able to behave differently to get a better outcome for yourself. It’s quite simple – just change the meaning you give any situation!

A few years ago I was coaching an executive who hated her boss. She lost all motivation and inspiration for work and was becoming totally disengaged. Her workplace misery was spilling over into her personal life. After we had been working together for awhile we discovered one thing that she liked – that gave her positive feelings – and she focused on this one thing for 21 days until she was able to change her mindset about the situation and see it in a different light, in a way that worked for her. As a result, she behaved differently towards her boss and their relationship began to improve.

This serves to illustrate that we all have the power to change the way we see things. It’s really that simple. Don’t take life so seriously, have fun with it, be creative …. And remember, it is your choice to be happy or grumpy, or inspired or productive, or content … so what kind of day are you going to create today?

And remember, in the words of Noam Chomsky: Optimism is a strategy for making a better future. Because unless you believe that the future can be better, it’s unlikely you will step up and take responsibility for making it so. If you assume that there’s no hope, you guarantee that there will be no hope. If you assume that there are opportunities to change things, there is a chance you may contribute to making a better world. The choice is yours.

Just to recap…

How we SEE the world around us is a reflection of what is going on in our inner world. What we perceive or interpret as reality we project into our environment. The gold nugget here is… if you want to change your environment – change the way you see it, change the meaning you give it and change your outcome.

Stop wasting your time trying to change others, its impossible!

What you can do, is change the way that you see things and therefore the way you behave, and this will bring you the results you desire. Simply by focusing on yourself, pausing and being present for a few minutes a day you can effect big changes in your world. Watch them unfold …